The part I remember started with my going through a box, a large cardboard one like you pack when you're moving, but it also had the feel of opening birthday presents. I took out a copy of The Road, which I thought was silly because I already own that book. So I was going to tell my mother that, but she claimed she wasn't the one who gave it to me. Then I let it fall open in my hands, and noticed that there was something in between the pages -- what looked like several small pamphlets, but which I recognized as revised printer proofs, just the pages that had needed last-minute corrections. I wasn't supposed to have these, so it meant that some editorial assistant had probably accidentally packed it and sent it to me, but the fact that I was just getting around to going through the box now meant that they had been sitting there for ages, and the printer had probably been holding the job until they got the proofs back with the final OK.

So then I'm at my old job (and I used to work for Cormac McCarthy's publisher, but this is not the job in my dream), meaning to return the book that was mistakenly sent to me. And I get talking to my former boss, and telling her about my current gig, and it's all very pleasant and super-friendly, until I'm about ready to go, and she asks me to wait a minute, disappears into someone's office, and comes back with that someone who supposedly wants to talk with me.

The someone opens with something like, "So this technical editor thing, that's a total lie, right?" And I protest, and she kind of switches gears all "just kidding!" and abruptly starts talking about cars, and about marketing, and I vaguely get the sense that she's offering me a job in the most backhanded possible way, until I say that I really have to get going or I'll be late for my real job, and she says something like, "OK, well think about it," and I ask her what the money would be like, and she names a number that once would have been tempting if the work did not sound like everything I didn't want to do, and I sort of laugh inside while outwardly I nod and smile.

But then I go back to say bye to my old boss before I go, and realize I haven't actually given her the book I came here to drop off, and I'm looking in my bag for it, but though I've got several other hardcovers rattling around in there, none of them is the right one with the critical proofs in them, and I can't believe that I came all this way and forgot to bring it, but I'm running late and ...

I wake up. I am not late. I go to work and actually have a pretty good day.

PART OF THE GOOD DAY was adding CSS to an online help system in French. We were using a new authoring tool and the HTML it output was pure vanilla: Times Roman, 12 point, links in blue that turn purple after you click them. The kind of thing you'd look at and think you were back in the mid-90's. I was showing Geoff this, as I was slowly dragging it into the 21st century, and we were talking about the time warp, saying "Maybe we should just embrace it, and put an 'Under Construction' sign on there. Only it'd have to be a French 'Under Construction' sign. Where would we find that?"

"Well, the guy would probably be lying down on the job, with a cigarette."

"He'd be on strike."

"On strike, smoking a Gauloise."

SPAM THAT I COULDN'T quite bring myself to delete:

Subject: byzantium bullish diamagnetism
From:    "Ashley Huynh" <rclive@mfg.li>
Date:    Tue, July 24, 2007 2:07 pm
To:      Kellnerin

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AND FORTUNE COOKIES from last night:

A COUPLE WEEKS AGO someone was taking a bunch of new hires around the office introducing them to everyone. When she came to the pod where most of Documentation sits, she let the new hires introduce themselves, and let us introduce ourselves, and then said "This is a very important pod to know, because these lovely people --" and here she was interrupted by someone walking through on the way to a conference room, leaving us to wonder whether she was going to praise the startling clarity and beauty of our documentation, or our invaluable contribution by convincing users that the hacks they create are in fact the desired behavior, until she resumed, "These kind people leave chocolate out for us" -- and she indicated the basket on a small table in the middle of our desks, which our boss Nat regularly fills with Hershey's products -- "so when the snack cabinet is empty, you can come here and get your sugar fix. And that's Documentation," she finished.

"Or Chocumentation, apparently," remarked Kathleen, as the tour moved on to the next group.